Beyond the ABCs: Raising Communicators, Not Memorizers
Because Language Is More Than Letters & Numbers
Picture this: A proud parent excitedly films their toddler pointing at a colorful chart, reciting “A, B, C!” with a big smile. Another video pops up—this time, a tiny little one counting all the way to ten. It’s impressive. It’s adorable. And it’s everywhere.
Walk into any toy aisle, and the message is clear—early learning means letters, numbers, and colors. Flashing lights, catchy songs, and “smart” toys promise to teach these concepts faster than ever. No wonder parents feel like this is where they should start! ABCs and 123s are easy to measure, easy to quiz, and feel like a clear sign of intelligence and readiness for school.
But here’s what those videos don’t show: The same child who can name every letter might struggle to ask for help when they need it. The toddler who can count to ten might not yet know how to say, “I’m hungry” or “I want a turn.”
Because language isn’t just about knowing—it’s about using words to connect, express, and navigate the world. And if we focus only on memorization, we might be skipping the most important parts of communication.
Why Functional Language Comes First
It’s not that letters and numbers don’t matter—they absolutely do! But they hold the most value when they’re built on a strong foundation of real, meaningful communication.
Think of it like building a house. The ABCs and 123s might be the paint and decorations, but without a solid foundation—language for everyday interactions—the structure is shaky. When toddlers learn to use language first, academic skills naturally follow.
So where do we begin if not with flashcards and letter drills? With functional language—the words and phrases toddlers use to communicate their needs, thoughts, and feelings in everyday life. It’s not about memorizing; it’s about saying things like:
“I want more.”
“Help me.”
“Look at that!”
These are the building blocks of real communication. And once a child can communicate effectively, learning ABCs becomes part of a bigger, richer language journey.
Why Functional Language Matters
Imagine this: A toddler at the park sees a butterfly fluttering nearby. If they only know colors, they might say, “Yellow!” But if they have functional language, they might exclaim, “Look! A butterfly!” or “It’s flying!”
That’s the difference. Functional language gives toddlers the ability to share their experiences, ask for what they need, express excitement, and even solve problems. It helps them build relationships, navigate emotions, and engage with the world around them.
As parents, we have the power to shape how our children communicate. And the best part? We don’t need flash cards, fancy programs. or electronic toys. We just need everyday moments.
Everyday Opportunities for Functional Communication
You don’t need structured lessons to build strong communication skills—just daily life. Here’s how you can incorporate functional language into routines you’re already doing:
Mealtime: Offer choices: “Do you want an apple or a banana?”
Bath time: Describe actions: “The water is warm. Let’s wash your hair.”
Errands: Narrate what’s happening: “I see a red car! We’re putting apples in the basket.”
Want to make the most of these moments? Grab our Daily Routine Guide—you’re already doing the routines, now let’s make them powerful for language development!
Toys as Learning Tools
Play is a toddler’s real work. Whether they’re stacking blocks, pushing cars, or feeding a baby doll, they’re learning through every interaction.
If your home is filled with toys that focus on ABCs and numbers, don’t worry—you can still use them to build communication! Instead of emphasizing letter names, shift the focus to powerful words and concepts:
Instead of quizzing letters, describe what’s happening: “The tiger is jumping in the box!”
Instead of counting, model concepts like in and out: “Let’s put the ball in. Now take it out!”
Not sure how to turn your child’s favorite toys into language-building tools? Our Play Guide gives you ideas for incorporating functional language with 10 classic toys most families already own!
When Do ABCs and Numbers Matter?
So, do letters and numbers matter? Of course! But they’re most meaningful when introduced alongside strong communication skills.
Think about it—when a child can ask questions, describe objects, and engage in simple conversations, learning colors and letters fits naturally into their world. Academic skills should enhance communication, not replace it.
By prioritizing functional language first, we help children develop deeper understanding, problem-solving abilities, and real-world learning connections.
How to Support Functional Communication
Looking for ways to encourage your toddler’s communication skills? Start here:
✔️ Recognize that communication isn’t just words—gestures, sign language, pointing, and even simple sounds count!
✔️ Respond to all communication attempts—if your child points to their cup instead of saying “water,” model: “Oh, you want water! Here’s your water.”
✔️ Model language naturally—describe what’s happening in the moment: “You’re pushing the car fast!” or “I’m stirring the soup. It smells yummy!”
✔️ Follow their interests—if they’re excited about something, talk about it! “Oh wow, it’s a big, loud truck!”
The Bottom Line
Prioritizing functional communication makes everyday life easier, more meaningful, and sets the stage for future learning. When toddlers can express themselves, they gain confidence, independence, and the ability to truly connect with the world around them.
So next time you see a video of a toddler reciting the ABCs, remember—there’s something even more powerful than knowing letters. It’s knowing how to use words to interact, engage, and share their world.
And that’s the foundation that will carry them through a lifetime of learning.
